The Adventures of Super Bitch.

I've never really had an archnemesis so this is kind of a new thing for me. I'm in uncharetered territory. I'd like to think that, generally, I get along with everyone. So it's been interesting working with someone who genuinely doesn't like me...and trust me, the feeling is mutual. It's so ridiculously unneccessary, I almost can't even tell the story without feeling ashamed that I've let it get to this point. It all started back in May.

There's a guy named Freeze who works here. Nevermind the fact that he's been fired from CBS three times in the past...it's not an integral part of my story but it does shed a little light on the caliber of the individual I'm talking about. (Don't ask me why they've hired him back so many times, I don't make those decisions around here). Anyways, Freeze and I started out on good terms. We have mutual friends in common and have hung out in the same crowd/circle quite a few times in the past. I've never agreed with the way he chooses to live his life but fully understand that if it doesn't personally affect me, it isn't any of my business...so I've always kept my opinions to myself.

One of our friend's had a birthday a couple of months ago and we were all going to go out the weekend before (his birthday was on a Tuesday or Wednesday). Freeze couldn't find a babysitter so he pitched a fit that we were all going to go without him. Again, nevermind the fact that he has no problem leaving his daughter with his parents when he wants to go to Tahoe or Vegas for the weekend...or that he will trade days with his ex to suit his scheduling needs on other occasions...nonetheless, the group decides not to go so that we could accomodate Freeze.

This story is starting to run long...let me speed it up.

So Freeze decides that we should all go out the weekend after (which happened to be Memorial Day weekend) and he started sending out mass text messages and wanted people to text back confirming, yes or no, if they would be coming. I said that I'd help him out in any way if I was going to be in town...but I had plans to go to Lake Tahoe for the long weekend...and I wasn't alone. Most other people had plans too which is why we all wanted to do the birthday celebration the weekend before. As soon as Freeze realized that the majority of the group had other things going on, he started sending out mass text messages saying snarky things...accusing us of not being good friends, etc. After the third message I got, I couldn't bite my tongue anymore.

Finally I told him to stop making "dick comments" and he was so offended that he's now taken it upon himself to openly discuss his hatred for me in and around the workplace. Did I provoke him? Yes. Should I have ignored all of his asinine remarks? Yes. Do I share some of the responsibility for what has transpired? Of course. However, I thought it was all water under the bridge...nothing catastrophic...just a minor altercation. I was wrong.

Clearly, Freeze's contempt for me stems from something much more deep-rooted. I do not believe that our brief text message exchange could have caused this much of a stir, and if it has, then he is just as ridiculous of a person as I have believed him to be all along. I think I know what this is all really about but at the risk of sounding pretentious, I won't say it out loud...just like the other things I'd like to say about his moral fabric (or lack thereof) but have kept to myself.

I will say this: one of my coworkers has started a comic strip parodying my war with Freeze and it's called "The Adventures of Super Bitch." They are brilliant and hilarious...I get to stomp around the office cutting people down with my razor sharp rhetoric. Basically, it's the dialogue that runs through my head on a daily basis. I hope it gets to see the light of day...someday. If I can figure out a way to post some of them on here, I will.

In other news, to follow-up on my last post...I was running early for work today so I drove all the way over to the Starbucks by our old studio...because they know me there, they understand me and they certainly have enough sense to put a God damn sleeve on my coffee for me without me having to ask. Listen, I know it seems like I'm being demanding but the reality is that I get up at 3:45 in the morning everyday...you'd be cranky too if you're entire life was spent wandering around the world never feeling fully awake...a constant zombie-esque state of delerium resulting from many years of sleep deprivation. But this is the life I choose to lead, so I have no one to blame but myself. Anyways, I'd just like to point out that not only did my peeps at the OG Starbucks know to make my triple grande non-fat, no-whip mocha just the way I like it...but they went a step beyond the automatic placement of the brown sleeve on my cup and they gave me the little green plug that goes in the hole of the cup which prevents it from spilling out while I'm en route to work. It's the little things in life that make a big difference.